i find myself looking at my blog again, wondering what i’m doing with my life. sometimes its hard for me to chronicle my lifestory, as i tend to self censor (orly) and am quite a man who keeps secrets to himself. sure you may find me talking a lot to you (people in general), divulging what seems to be everything i know. i speak what is on my mind, but never wear my heart on my sleeves. (sleeves are long and hot)

its been a year since i’ve last entered anything onto the digital transcript, holding comments to myself, using facebook only to keep up with information rather than use it as a social tool (for i am antisocial at times haha). maintaining appearances is tiring. yet today i feel that i want to write something down, but i cannot bring myself to write it. i can only apologise for the cryptology i’m using, but i am in a way, lost at a crossroad once again. and i see some venues depart from my grasp. perhaps one day they will open again, but i can only stop myself from wondering what if. i regret nothing i’ve done. any leap of faith i have jumped in my life has tended to miss any nets, nor have found any reward to my risks. i watch as others prosper on a dare, as i can only continue to wish them well, hiding behind a wall of ones and zeroes, and the smiling mask of a clown’s illusion.

perhaps i’ll continue updating my blog, perhaps i will not. like the wind i follow only whims and impulses, and few things i have set out to do i continue for long. maybe ill do some game/ movie reviews, those are fun.

so, here’s the update of my life, all none of you so interested. Started playing MTG again. never thought i’d walk down this road again. i’d better get a job after NS. need to learn driving. many people are assholes. my life is a constant repeating failure of attempts. perhaps ill start bicycling. ord in a few months thats great. the score so far on my love life is well… depressing. maybe the only way ill have a gf is hoping i get hit on by gold diggers HAHA thats a laugh.